Love is

I didn't give you the gift of life, But in my heart I know. The love I feel is deep and real, As if it had been so.

For us to have each other Is like a dream come true! No, I didn't give you The gift of life, Life gave me the gift of you. --- Unknown

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Gods plans, and my plans...

So it has been a month since the last blog... I don't know why, life just happens so fast.  We are officially logged in in China, our LID date is August 7. 2013. So we have started the wait for our LOA(letter of approval).  The time frame for this is all over the place.  Some people get them in a week or two and some have been waiting over 100 days.  We are praying and hoping for a quick turn around.  Our little guy has gone too long without language, and he needs to come home. Please pray this goes through quickly.

We still have no match with our daughter.  We believe God is up to something and I hope to be able to share more about this soon.  For now I will just say pray for our babies, for those who are taking care of them.  Pray for every detail to fall into place and that they will be home quickly :)

Our fund raisers have not been doing very well.  I really don't know why that is.  It seems that we are meeting two very different feelings from people; 1) either they think if we are adopting, we should have the money to pay for it ourselves, or 2) they are busy and distracted and don't feel like it is their place to get involved.  Oh but we need help,  I wish that people could see what I see.  I wish they could see that very few adoptive parents have the money in the bank to just pay all the fees.  I wish they could see how great the need is for people from all walks of life to step up and stand together and help every child, no matter their age, find a home.  We also get the "there are so many kids here why aren't you helping them first before going to another country". Let me say, we are open to God bringing our children from anywhere He sees fit.  We believe one of our children is here, God just has some walls to move before she can be ours.  I would love to show everyone of the people who give us this "attitude" the conditions children in orphanages live in.  The lucky ones get to live in foster care. But thousands more live in group care facilities. Even in the best orphanages, where money isn't an issue, there are still not enough hands to do what a mother and father do.  In most cases the little ones lay/stand/sit in cribs, or walkers or potty chairs for hours a day.  I have seen kids with open sores on their heads because they lay for hours on a wooden bed. Yes I said wooden, no soft mattress, no foam pad, just a hard bed.  Babies come home that have learned to self sooth by banging their heads on cribs, our pulling their hair or pinching themselves.  Baby rooms are eerily quiet because they have learned crying doesn't help.  These are in the better orphanages.  In most cases this isn't because the nannies don't care, but they have many, many, babies/toddlers and only a few hands.  In some cases there isn't enough food, so the children are thin and much smaller than normal. Many are fed congee, which is a soft thick rice soup, usually with broth and little vegetables or meat. Older children are not guaranteed a chance to go to school.  Even when they are, culturally people don't want orphans in their schools because they see it as bad luck.  These conditions are no longer allowed in the United States.  Each child has someone checking the home and making sure there is enough space for them, and enough food to eat.  I know the system is flawed, I know children get hurt and abused in care here too. I know there are not enough hands here either, but care giving to orphans here is much different than other countries.  Some orphans receive great care, they are fed well and interacted with and educated, but my whole point is "don't assume you know something you don't" "Don't judge based on what you think you know about orphans".  The need is great here and in every country! No child should be valued over another because of where they were born. Get involved, ask an adoptive family what you can do to help them.  Assume they do need you, because most adoptive families are fund raising and there is much to do.  Many times your help is more needed than your money.  You may not be interested in the fund raiser they are doing but your mom or brother or friend or coworker may be.  You might not have the money to buy a ticket or an item they are selling but more than likely you know someone who can.  You can change an orphans life,  you can join a team and help give a child the gift of family.  So instead of forming opinions about what you think we should do, or be able to do... DO SOMETHING yourself :)

Ok off the soapbox again...

I am truly and forever blessed to be a part of adoption.  I am blessed by people who love us and are helping.  I am blessed to be called Momma by these precious kids God has given me, by birth or adoption.  I am grateful God has allowed me to walk this road, and even more grateful that He is walking it before me.  Thank you again for every prayer prayed and every cent given, for every moment of your time.  You are each a part of team Ferguson...  Thank you Father for all these blessings... :)


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